Geeky Chuckles


As many of you may know (and guess), I’m a sucker for Geeky one liners and jokes.

One of my favorites is “Have you heard of the band 1023MB? They haven’t got a Gig yet”


I found this great collection of acronyms and one liners. I’ve listed a few of my favorites below, you can see the full list on the site. As a disclaimer, I’m a Windows user and I love it, but some MS jokes are too good to pass up.


One Liners:

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.

Unix is user friendly. It’s just selective about who its friends are.

Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your Microsoft product.

Microsoft: “You’ve got questions. We’ve got dancing paperclips.”

Erik Naggum: “Microsoft is not the answer. Microsoft is the question. NO is the answer.”

Mac users swear by their Mac, PC users swear at their PC.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.

If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I’d antialias my graphics!

If brute force doesn’t solve your problems, then you aren’t using enough.

Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world’s population.

An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar. The first one orders a pint, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint… “I understand”, says the bartender – and pours two pints.





For the full list, visit:



Bill’s Attempt to Seize Industry Control (BASIC)

Enemy of Book (eBook)

I Blame Microsoft (IBM)

I Protest Adobe (iPad)

I Prefer Hipness Over Network Excellence (iPhone)

Idiots Price Our Devices (iPod)

Most Applications Crash, INot, The Operating System Hangs (Macintosh)

Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers (Microsoft)

NLonger A Possible Solution TEscape Record-buying (NAPSTER)

Produced Erroneous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics (Pentium)

Successfully Pestering Advertising Material (SPAM)

Windows Mistake Edition (Windows ME)


For the full list, visit:






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